There are many reasons to want to use gender-neutral titles and terms. Gendered titles and terms create an instant impression in people, we live in a cisnormative world, full of misogyny and sexism. Even without realising we have an internal bias about certain terms depending on the gender they are usually assigned too.
Gendered terms don’t always fit with people who are trans or non-binary. while many non-binary people use what most people consider gendered terms, titles and pronouns, some do not. Some used a mix.
I personally use all pronouns (but usually use thes/them in writing), use Mx almost exclusively and am not a mum but a parent. It’s different for everyone. Not all non-binary parents go by gender neutral names. Not all non-binary people are even gender neutral. Non-binary just means genders outside, beyond the binary and including the binary.
Many gender neutral terms aren’t even new, are part of our everyday language. Even neopronouns aren’t new.
Of course, language is always evolving, and there are other ways of addressing family members. Snappy, my niece and nephew all call my step-dad Dap. My sisters’ kids call one of their grandfathers Gaia. My friends’ kids call their grandmother Gargar. Snappy calls me Bow – a name he came up with himself at
So, you want a gender-neutral alternative to… your title? How your parents refer to you? What do your kids call you? What do you call your non-binary child of your sibling? Here is a list of some alternatives to consider:
- They / Them / Themselves
- Ze / Zir / Zirself
- Xe / Xem / Xyrself
- Thon / Thons / Thonself
- Fae / Faer / Faerself
- Parent – formal, yes, but neutral.
- Ren/Renny – short form / derived from parent.
- Mapa / Pama – Mixes of mama and papa.
- Maddy – mix of mummy & daddy but also the short form of the girl’s name Madeline.
- Zaza – a neutal version of mama/papa
- Nini – a neutral version of mama/papa
- Sib – short form of sibling and informal and neutral term for
- Pibling -neutral for your parents siblings
- Auncle – a combination of aunt and uncle.
- Untie/Unty – combination uncle and aunt
- Nibling – combination of niece/nephew and sibling.
- Kid; neutral, informal.
- Little one / Dear One
- Tot/ Toddler/ Tween/Teen
- Birlfriend – mix of girlfriend and boyfriend
- Feyfriend – based on the pronoun fae
- Enbyfriend – enby is short form for non-binary (N.B Not all non-binary like being called Enbies).
- Significant Other/SO
- Other Half
- [name of the person you’re dating]friend – cuts out the gender issue entirely
- Soul Mate – should you believe in such a thing.
- Companion – should you be a Time Lord
- Mx – Pronouned Mix or Mux.
- Misc – short the word miscellaneous.
- Ind – short for Individual.
Miscellaneous Titles & Terms
- Good Morning/Good Afternoon – a good way to start formal emails instead of Dear Sir/Madam. I do it and I nicked the idea from the local council.
- Friend – infers some familiarity
- Citizen – somewhat formal
- Ind – short of Individual
- Fanby – neutral version of fangirl/fanboy, a mix of fan and enby.
- Fangeek – neutral version of fangirl/fanboy
- Regent – title of a ruler – regents are generally in charge until the monarch comes of age.
- Prin – neutral version of Prince or Princess
- Deity – neutral word for a God
- Police Officer
This isn’t a comprehensive list, how can it ever be? But if you have suggestions, know of other terms or have requests let me know in the comments or via our contact form.